Leo, over at ZenHabits, has a great post today – The Incredible Power of Contentment.

Leo gives some good advice on what constitutes contentment, and how to achieve it. I like the section on how, “We choose whether we are happy or unhappy” particularly. Judging from some of the comments he got, I feel there is lingering confusion over what that means. People often leap on that statement (which I have made to friends as well) with responses that begin with, “But, what about this…”, or “Well not if you’re this…”, or “you can’t be happy if…” The commonality of all those statements is that they have a hidden element of choice that most people take for granted. They are not statements dictating choice, but are rather statements about conditions. X is true therefore happiness is not possible. Who is making that decision? The statement maker. No one else. The person making the statement is choosing the level of authority of those statements without recognizing that they are the ones, in the moment, authoring them. “You can’t be happy in a world where children starve to death!” Okay, I will grant that you can’t be, but that is a decision of opinion and one you have made for yourself. You have all the power there. Make another choice.

Another factor that Leo hits on several times is our response to other people in our lives we choose to regard as significant.  Friends, family, lovers; these people have strong emotional impact in our lives because of the value we place on them.  Because of that it can be hard to be content with them when they do something we find objectionable.  Leo suggests that we do not try to change them, and instead value them for how they are.  I see it a bit different.  Or, rather, I would add a distinction.  Sometimes a person we love very much may do something we hate very much.  We should address that something.  The problem comes in when we take changing how they are behaving for how they are.  When I have a problem with something that someone I love has done, I try to stay focused on the something.  In other words, it’s okay to be content with how someone is, and be discontent with how someone is behaving.  Correct the action, not the person.

Leo, then goes on to outline some ideas on how to become more content.  Several of them fit under one category that I have found very useful of late.  Very useful.  This is to approach gratefulness as a practice, rather than a result.  Rather than waiting for something to happen and for gratefulness to spontaneously arise,  I have taken the advice of Brother David Steindl-Rast, over at gratefulness.org, and use gratefulness as an active practice.  I try in every situation to find something to be grateful for, and make it a point to thank people for their efforts in my life.  This has produced a profound change in my general contentment level and had a very enriching effect on all of my various relationships.  Give it a try, I think you will be very pleasantly surprised.
Thanks Leo, for another fabulous post!

What do you do to raise your contentment level?  I would very much love to hear it.